The Michael A. Naso Institute of Comedy

[Lief 🗽]

Everyone, please! The Institute is no place for pointless unfunny bickering. Here, let's discuss this sublime work of art:

Question

Why do all these people say that "Israel is our greatest ally"?

Answer

It gets politicians elected.

If there was a question on a test I gave and you answered by first writing "Question" and repeating the question I just gave you and then writing "Answer" and stealing off someone else, do you know what I would do to you? I would flunk you, that's what I would do to you.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

We should just have an RSS bot that automatically posts every Professor in here.

[Antonio the Sixth]

We should just have an RSS bot that automatically posts every Professor in here.

Very true.

[CARLHAYDEN]

Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?

So Joe, do you believe this forum and/or the internet existed in 1969?

[Joe Republic]

Once again you completely missed the point, CARL, but nice try anyway.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

Yes, typical Ernest.

You see, neither this forum nor the internet existed 1969.

Is there no limit to the extent of CARL's ability to self-fail?

So Joe, do you believe this forum and/or the internet existed in 1969?

I just shattered my skull from facepalming so hard.

[Oakvale]

You do realize that most male humans do masturbate, and that looking at a pretty picture or an interesting fillum can aid in this healthful and necessary practice?

Yes, I understand that this is the case.

But not your good self, eh?  Is that difficult?

I'm actually a computer programme designed to test out the reception of sarcasm on the internet, so it's technically impossible.

The whole thread is hilarious, actually.

[Holmes]

Was gonna post it. opebo asking Al if he masturbates... well, I don't think anyone is gonna make a better post here today, so I'm out.

[Lief 🗽]

Yeah, opebo and Al don't interact enough. I feel like a lot of really entertaining stuff could come out of more scenes between the two of them.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

Yeah, opebo and Al don't interact enough. I feel like a lot of really entertaining stuff could come out of more scenes between the two of them.

[minionofmidas]

Once again you completely missed the point, CARL, but nice try anyway.

You didn't answer the question!

[Landslide Lyndon]

so, on the same day Joe comes out of the closet, he re-registers as a Republican?!

Same thing, really, isn't it?

[All Along The Watchtower]

You do realize that most male humans do masturbate, and that looking at a pretty picture or an interesting fillum can aid in this healthful and necessary practice?

Yes, I understand that this is the case.

But not your good self, eh?  Is that difficult?

If that's not an Atlas thread, then I'm John Huntsman and I approve this message.

I'm actually a computer programme designed to test out the reception of sarcasm on the internet, so it's technically impossible.

The whole thread is hilarious, actually.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Context

I think this should be a question on the Republican debate.

answer: 9-9-9

[Antonio the Sixth]

Cain: 999 times
Bachmann: We need to stop Barrack Obama's constant masturbation
Santorum: Masturbation goes against family values
Gingrich: I don't masturbate, I just cheat on my wife
Huntsman: (boycotting the question)
Paul: Every American citizen has the freedom to masturbate
Perry: Under my leadership, the state of Texas has led the nation in masturbation
Romney: I support masturbation. I mean, I oppose it.

[Paul Kemp]

I think the reason why so many hacks on the left hate Napoleon is because he refuses engage in the brutal nastiness that they love. Px's bitchiness about him is some good proof of that.

Pot meets the kettle black.

English on work you should.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

[Marokai Backbeat]

Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real.

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real.

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.

No Atlasia and no attention-whoring, please.

[Хahar 🤔]

Oakvale deserves props for his incredibly accurate and amusing portrayal of what I would almost assuredly be, were Atlasian politics real.

I meet Marokai Blue at a Nyman bar. It's around three in the afternoon, and he looks frazzled. He's wearing a raincoat for reasons I don't understand and carrying a large binder. Throughout the course of our conversation he'll pull a document from the binder and wave it around to illustrate a point. I order straight whiskey, he a Cosmopolitan. After gently insulting his choice of beverage, I get down to business. We sit for hours, as I chain-smoke cigarettes and Marokai orders progressively stronger drinks. With passage of the smoking ban some moons ago, the barman should technically ask me to stop, but he's a wizened old Latino man who looks about ninety and doesn't seem to care. Anyway.

No Atlasia and no attention-whoring, please.

Who made you the guardian of this thread?

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

This user is currently ignored.

Finally. Xahar's post that make some sense

[Grumpier Than Thou]

This user is currently ignored.

Finally. Xahar's post that make some sense

[Landslide Lyndon]

Why would anyone vote against this site? Its great to see that they are giving jobs to the local residents, even if that means webpage design.

A bold strike against the plague of preteen unemployment

[© tweed]

Really? You think his last name is actually "Job's"? Come on, man...

[Mr. Morden]

Connect the dots for me...

hows does privacy under the 14th = abortion on demand?

I personally am pro choice, but you just can't get there via the 14th.. imho....

I just connected the dots in your post for you. I'll expect you to do it next time. It's really quite easy.