Chapter Three: Buckets of Warm Piss

[Cincinnatus]

Welcome.  Not a lot of papers in circulation, and the Atlasian people need another news source.  I will be writing articles in here soon, but first, I'll be creating a poll.

analyses

[Cincinnatus]

Can I get an iPad subscription? 

We're creating a free APP for all apple supported products.  However, because my capital is low, I had to hire an inexperienced tech dept.  I wouldn't hold my breathe

[Cincinnatus]

Sounds communist

Censored

[Cincinnatus]

So if you're done doing approvals, what will y'all right about? And seriously, I only want my news on my iPad now. An app is a must if you want to remain competitive and have my invest in your new venture.

You're in luck though. I have $15M left over from my last senate race, and am willing to donate to your new business in exchange for an endorsement/hefty donation once you're profitable.

I'm not saying I won't do approvals.  My main point is, I'm sick of just approval pollings all over the place.  I'd like to talk about some regional issues (Mainly NE, but if anyone has information for another region that would be fine as well).  Also, I'd be writing about bills on the floor, and hopefully, I can get some interviews and opinion pieces rolling later on.  

Also, I can't accept your donation, because this is "The People's Paper", and I would be doing a disservice to the People by accepting their money that was intended for the purposes of your campaign.  Furthermore, an endorsement must be earned Senator, so you'll have to treat me to an expensive dinner first.

[Cincinnatus]

IDS "Trojan Act" Unconstitutional

Monday, Sept 05

Two months ago the IDS passed the "Trojan Act", placing condoms in accessible areas in order to increase safe sex.  However, today's GM article revealed an obvious problem.  The much celebrated act, is in fact unconstitutional. 

With the resignation of Kal, the Attorney General position has been vacant.  It is unknown when, and who, Polnut may tap for the position.  What is known, is that for two months a blatantly unconstitutional bill was implemented in the IDS.  While the law does not actually "recognize the Dibble as a "currency"", it is expected that with the recent GM article, a lawsuit will occur.

Game Changer

With the recent announcement declaring his candidacy for President, Governor Winfield may very well have changed the direction of this election cycle.  Into the second half of his term as Governor of the Northeast, Winfield has continuously received high praise and enormous support from within the region.  Such support may hinder another right-wing candidate from obtaining a united vote. 

After an embarrassing defeat last election, the RPP is expected to produce a strong candidate.  Senator Duke who is scheduled to make an announcement within the next few days, may very well declare his intention to move into the White House in October.  If he does run, while the Senator has strong support from moderates, his VP choice remains crucial in retaining votes that may otherwise change camps.

[Cincinnatus]

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The IDS does not recognize it as a "currency" so I don't see the problem here.

It remains to be seen, as no one has sued as of yet.  Of course saying you don't recognize it as "currency" doesn't negate the fact that you're accepting coined silver/gold outside of the Federal Gov't and allowing it to be used in a "barter system" (Which is essentially how currency is used.  I give you X coins, you give me X wheat and so on).  Fun play on words, but a lawsuit shouldn't have much difficulty.   

* Puts journalist cap back on.

[Cincinnatus]

TPP would like to acknowledge Senator Duke for consistently writing The People in reference.  Thus, we would like to award him an all expense payed trip to our private ocean front location. 

[Cincinnatus]

An idea just came to me. Once I retire, I would like to join The People and their Paper as a columnist. Where do I apply?

You need not apply.  An office already awaits you.

[Cincinnatus]

TPP's Chief Senate analyst was fired today, when it was found that the the paper failed to realize an amusing quark with the Atlasian Duels Act.  It has now come to the attention of The People that Section 4 could, in theory, allow for strategic registration every week.  TPP contacted the AG's office, but has yet to receive any response. 

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[Cincinnatus]

I suppose I will take over as Chief Senate Analyst. I need a new job title after this month anyway.

Done.  This position comes with top pay too..well..right below mine anyway

[Cincinnatus]

46th Senate Voting History



1.  Selective Education Act    

Sponsor:  BRTD
Failed: November 11th, 2011
Aye;  bgwah, kalwejt, Marokai, BRTD
Nay;  MOPolitico, Yankee, Napoleon, Duke, JBrase

2. Libyan Aid Bill

Sponsor: Duke
Signed; November 14th, 2011.
Aye; Marokai, Napoleon, Kal, MOPolitico, Duke, Yankee, BRTD
Nay; bgwah

3. Atlasian Anti-Bullying Bill 2011

Sponsor: Napoleon
Signed; November 14th, 2011
Aye; bgwah, Yankee, Duke, Marokai, MOPolitico, Kal
Nay;

4. Atlasian Duels Act

Sponsor: bgwah
Aye; bgwah, Yankee, Marokai, Duke, MOPolitico
Nay; Kal

5.  Repeal of the You Can't Beat a DUI..Act

Sponsor: Napoleon
Aye;
Nay; Yankee, Marokai, bgwah, MOPolitico, BRTD,
Abstain; Kal

6. National Initiative Amendment

Sponsor: Kal
Aye; MOPolitico, Yankee, Kal, Marokai, Duke, Nathan,
Nay; Napoleon
Abstain; bgwah

7. The Recall of Senators Amendment

Sponsor: JBrase
Aye; Kal,
Nay; Yankee, Napoleon, Marokai, MOPolitico, Duke, Nathan, bgwah

8. Seperate Elections Amendment

Sponsor: Kal
Could not obtain 2/3
Aye; Kal, Marokai, MOPolitico, Duke, Yankee
Nay; Napoleon, BRTD, bgwah, Nathan

9. Credit where credit is due Resolution

Sponsor(s): Marokai, Duke
Aye; Marokai, JBrase, Nathan, Kal, Yankee, Duke, Napoleon,
Nay; bgwah, BRTD

10. Living Wage Act

Sponsor(s): Marokai, bgwah
Aye; bgwah, Marokai, Duke, Napoleon, Nathan, Kal, Yankee, BRTD
Nay;
Abstain; MOPolitico

11. National Ilikeverin Day

Sponsor; Kal
Signed; November 27th, 2011
Aye; Nathan, Napoleon, MOPolitico, Kal, Duke, Yankee, BRTD
Nay; bgwah

12. Caucus Infrastructure Act

Sponsor(s); Marokai, Duke, Yankee, bgwah
Signed; December 5th, 2011.
Aye; bgwah, Marokai, Kal, Napoleon, BRTD, Yankee, Duke, JBrase, MOPolitico, Nathan
Nay;

13. Death Penalty Reinstatement Act

Sponsor; Kal
Notes; Introduced for constituent (*Joke Bill)
Tabled


Advisement:
TPP can't guarantee 100% accuracy, 100% of the time.  If you have any inquires, or complaints, please contact the editor.

[Cincinnatus]

Northeast Assembly Legislative History


October 2011-December 2011


1)  Anti-Conscription Act

Sponsor: Morgan
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (November 8th, 2011)
Aye; Scott, Morgan, wormyguy, Nathan, 20RP12, RFK, Cincinnatus
Nay;

2)  The Preventing HxC Dancing In Public To Protect Citizen Safety Act of 2011

Sponsor: 20RP12
Aye; 20RP12, Scott, Nathan
Nay; wormy, Cincinnatus, Morgan,
Abstain; RFK

3) The Northeast Cabinet Act

Sponsor: Scott
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (November 21, 2011)
Aye; Scott, Nathan, RFK, Cincinnatus
Nay; wormy, 20RP12

4)  The Making Recycling Fun And Cool Because Nobody Likes To Do It Other Than Hippies Act of 2011

Sponsor; 20RP12
Withdrawn by sponsor

5) Stone Wall Preservation Act

Sponsor: Cincinnatus [written by homely]
Aye; Scott
Nay; wormy, 20RP12
Abstain; Morgan

6) The Music Piracy Decriminalization Act of 2011

Sponsor; 20RP12
Withdrawn by Sponsor

7) Amendment to the NE Constitution - Residential Officeholder Act of 2011

Sponsor: 20RP12
Aye; 20RP12
Nay; Scott, Cincinnatus, RFK

Amendment to the NE Constitution - Lieutenant Governor Vacancy Act

Sponsor: Scott
Failed
Aye; Scott, 20RP12, Cincinnatus,
Nay;

9) The Absolutely Silly Act

Sponsor; Morgan
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (December 6th, 2011)
Aye; Morgan, 20RP12
Nay; wormy,
Abstain; Scott, Dallasfan, Cincinnatus

10) Removing That Stupid Parental Advisory Sticker From CDs Act Of 2011

Sponsor: 20RP12
Withdrawn by Sponsor

11) Amendment to The Vacancy filling Act

Sponsor: Cincinnatus
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (December 9th, 2011)
Aye; Scott, Cincinnatus, 20RP12, Dallasfan, wormyguy, RFK
Nay;







*  2) Tie never broken by Lt. Governor.  Remains unsigned, and uncontested.
*  Giovanni's appointment revoked, Assembly not allowed to nominate.
*  AndrewCT nominated, and swore in as Lt. Governor.



Advisement:
TPP can't guarantee 100% accuracy, 100% of the time.  If you have any inquires, or complaints, please contact the editor.

[Cincinnatus]

IDS Legislative History

October 2011-December 2011

1)  Public Notification Bill

Signed November 18th, 2011.
Aye; Progressive Realist, Yelnoc
Nay;

2)  Amendment to the SE Militia Initiative

Signed November 23, 2011
Sponsor: Clarence
Aye; Clarence, Yelnoc
Nay;

3)  IDS Militia Structure Act

Signed December 11th, 2011.
Sponsor: Yelnoc
Aye; Yelnoc, Clarence, Pingvin99
Nay;

*Yelnoc made Imperial Speaker


Advisement:
TPP can't guarantee 100% accuracy, 100% of the time.  If you have any inquires, or complaints, please contact the editor.

[Cincinnatus]

An election is to be held at 12AM tomorrow.  As far as I'm aware, the only people to declare are Scott, wormy, and myself.  If you want to run, I suggest you declare today.

[Cincinnatus]

Very nice legislation guides!

They might could use an update....

You keep track of the IDS record and update it, and maybe I'll start working on the rest

[Cincinnatus]

Northeast Assembly Legislative History

December 2011-February 2012

1)Northeast Tax Reform Act of 2011
Sponsor: 20RP12
Fails
Aye; 20RP12
Nay; Scott, RFK, Dallasfan, Morgan, wormyguy

2) The Miscarraige of Justice Prevention Act
Sponsor: wormyguy
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (December 16, 2011)
Aye; Scott, wormyguy, 20RP12, Cincinnatus, Morgan, Dallasfan, RFK
Nay;

3) The Mountaintop Removal Ban Act
Sponsor: Scott
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (December 20, 2011)
Aye; Scott, Cincinnatus, Morgan, 20RP12
Nay; wormyguy

Session Ends

Note:
This session runs with only 5 Representatives under the new constitution
Scott elected Speaker.


1)  The Northeastern Anti-Bully Initiative Act of 2011
Sponsor: Scott
Failed (Governor Snowstalker)
Aye; Scott,
Nay; wormyguy,
Abstain; Cincinnatus

2) The Dihydrogen Monoxide Ban Act
Sponsor: wormyguy
Fails
Aye; wormyguy
Nay; Scott, Cincinnatus

3) The Incredibly Important Act
Sponsor: wormyguy
Fails
Aye;
Nay; Scott, Cincinnatus
Abstain; wormyguy

4) Second Northeast Tax Reform Act of 2011
Sponsor; Cincinnatus (On behalf of Governor Snowstalker)
Vetoed by Governor Snowstalker (January 16, 2012)
Aye; Morgan
Nay; wormyguy
Abstain; Scott

5) Amendment to the SOAP Act - Protest and Analysis Thread Act
Sponsor: Scott
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (January 13, 2012)
Aye; Scott, Morgan, wormyguy, Cincinnatus
Nay;

6) Repeal of the Ballot Standardization Act
Sponsor: Cincinnatus
Signed by Governor Snowstalker (January 16, 2012)
Aye; Scott, Cincinnatus
Nay;
Abstain; Morgan

7) Northeast Symbols Act
Sponsor: Cincinnatus
Vetoed by Governor Snowstalker (January 18, 2012)
Aye; Cincinnatus, Scott
Nay;

The Act to Provide Transportation of a Public Manner to Working Individuals and Families Act (APTOPMWIFA)
Sponsor: Morgan
Vetoed by Governor Snowstalker (January 25, 2012)
Aye; Scott, Morgan
Nay; Cincinnatus, wormyguy

9) Northeast Symbols Act
Sponsor: Cincinnatus
Previously Vetoed.  Signed by Governor Snowstalker (January 25, 2012)
Aye; Cincinnatus, Scott
Abstention; wormyguy

10)  The Government Responsibility Act of 2012
Sponsor: JerseyRules
Failed
Aye; JerseyRules, wormyguy
Nay; Scott, Morgan, Cincinnatus

11) The Fair Taxation Act of 2012
Sponsor: JerseyRules
Awaiting vote by The People.
Aye; JerseyRules, wormyguy
Nay; Scott, Cincinnatus

12) The Anti-Prohibition & Blue Law Repeal Act
Sponsor: Scott
Awaiting Action by Governor Andrew
Aye; Cincinnatus, Scott, Morgan
Nay; wormyguy

[Cincinnatus]

Very nice legislation guides!

They might could use an update....

You keep track of the IDS record and update it, and maybe I'll start working on the rest

Oh yeah, I forgot I worked here.  I'll get around to it...

You better because home office is considering cuts.

[Cincinnatus]

Mr. homely, I wasn't aware you worked here but I certainly do have a top floor office awaiting you

[Cincinnatus]

Oh, I get to be Lt. Governor as well?  Lucky me..  Now to just figure out how to get rid of the Governor.. 

[Cincinnatus]

I hope this is revived full time and more news sources are established. I had already requested a press secretary so now I request the press.

This establishment could easily participate more in the News scene if The People are given a private meeting with the President-elect to discuss a certain proposal..

[Cincinnatus]

Huzzah!

The People will not tolerate post-padding sir.  Kindly exit this establishment before we are forced to take decisive action.

In other news, The People are currently considering new applications for those they deem worthy.  Be aware, your sole mission as a part of this staff will be to crush this.. "competition" called The Porcupine, until such a time that the Editor agrees to submit a merger.

[Cincinnatus]

Apparently I'm a political cartoonist for this paper now or something.

You could have waited for me to announce your hiring, but I guess this works too.. Lol

[Cincinnatus]

BREAKING:  Massive Overhaul in Effect


In light of recent competition, The People have implemented an enormous expansion of their staff.  Effective immediately, we will now employ a regional correspondent for each of the five regions.  In addition, we have hired a new Political analyst, and are currently negotiating contracts for several other prospects, and most importantly, a Midwest correspondent.  The current staff at this time is listed below;

Staff:

Cincinnatus - Majority Stakeholder and NE Correspondent
Duke - Senior Political and Legal Analyst
Mechaman - Political Analyst
Yelnoc - IDS Correspondent
Fuzzy - Pacific Correspondent
Cathcon - ME Correspondent and Political Cartoonist

[Cincinnatus]

I expect nothing less than the best pro-administration propaganda.

That all depends on the patronage the administration is willing to give The People.

[Cincinnatus]

We are proud to announce the addition of SJoyce to our dedicated team.  He will assume the title of Senior Foreign Policy Analyst, and looks forward to using his experience and dedication as SOEA to serve The People.  Embrace your new advocate!