ReLOVEution - The Common Man's struggle for Freedom in 2012

[Yelnoc]

Crunch.  A snow shovel broke into the thick snow.  Bringing his thin frame to bear, Angus tossed the load aside.  He stopped breathing heavily.  The first big snow is always hardest to clear.  It was still snowing, the white flakes floating down from above.  Angus wiped his forehead with a glove, and surveyed his yard.  The accumulation had already reached two feet.  And the guy on Channel 9 said it would get worse before it got better.

Angus grunted when he saw where his shoveled snow had landed.  The snow man he and his son rolled together that morning had been decapitated, its carrot nose poking out of the drift pensively.  

“What’s up?” asked his wife, dragging her shovel over.  Angus gestured at the sad snow man.

“Oh, you boys will make another one tomorrow.”

“Yeah.”

She turned around, surveying the cleared driveway.  “It appears our work here is finished for today.”

“Not quite,” retorted Angus, stepping into the snow.  Hmm, where did I put – “Oof!”  Angus pulled himself out of the snow and dusted off his coat with as much dignity as he could muster before turning and wiping off the sign.  He finished clearing snow in front of it, so that the people across the street could be reminded of Dr. Paul.

“Now we’re finished,” he quipped, turning to his wife.

“Are you still going to that thing today?” she asked, looking out nervously at the roads.  A truck had cleared the road a few hours ago, but snow had already accumulated and the roads were sure to be iced along the way.

He flashed a grin.  “Of course I am.”  Need to remember to check the chain before I go.

She couldn’t help but smile.  “Ok, be safe.”

“I will.  Now let’s go get some hot chocolate!”

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

I love it! This already qualifies as a great piece of literature just because you're including one of our very own forumites as a character!

[Yelnoc]

Angus backed out of his driveway, tires crunching against the thin layer of slush.  The Ford Explorer’s engine sputtered but recovered nobly.  Angus patted the dashboard.  Hold together baby, hold together.

Before hitting the open road, Angus stopped by Terry Meyer’s house.  Terry had called just as he was walking out the door to ask for a ride to the caucus.  Apparently his car wasn’t starting.  Angus winced as the old SUV croaked again.

He pulled up to the cookie-cutter house and sighed. Shame that is, when I was a kid houses had character.  If it wasn’t for….  After a few minutes, Angus leaned on his horn.  Out shuffled Terry, clutching a thermos of coffee in one hand and a CD in another.

“Thanks for the ride, man.  I don’t know what’s with my car; I’ll have to take into the shop tomorrow.”

“No problem,” said Angus, shifting to first.  I love sticks…

Terry sipped on his coffee, waiting for his friend’s familiar dazed look to clear, before waving the CD.  

“Look at this, Angus.  'Best of Aerosmith'.  Got it for Christmas.”

“Pop it in,” said Angus, motioning towards the CD player.  I remember when we listened to Aerosmith on cassette…

Whir, click, shuffle.  Spinning, spinning…

Every time when I look in the mirror
All these lines on my face getting clearer
The past is gone
It went by, like dusk to dawn
Isn't that the way
Everybody's got the dues in life to pay

“So, Terry, who are you supporting?”

“I dunno, I was thinking about Newt but the more I think about the 90’s, the less appealing that idea becomes.”

“Well, you-know-who could always use your vote,” Angus said with a wink.

“I’ve heard,” retorted Terry dryly.

Angus shifted gears as they went up a hill.  The road was iced and he had to crawl all the way to the top.  He braced himself at the crest for the inevitable downhill.  His brow furrowed when he saw the number of cars littered on the road.

As he coasted down, he saw a youth, a man of maybe twenty years, standing along the road side, thumb up hitch-hiker style.  Behind him a Ford Taurus was wrapped around a tree, a bumper plastered with Ron Paul 2012 stickers hanging lazily from one side.  Angus coasted to a stop a few yards past the unlucky guy and rolled down his window.

“Hey, you ok there?”

The guy slid down to Angus’s car and poked his head through the window.  “Yeah, I’m ok, though my car will need some work.”  He paused for a momentum, glanced back at his totaled car, and then made up his mind.  “Um, are you guys going to the caucuses?”

“You bet.”  Angus hit the unlock button in the armrest.  Click. “Hop in.”

“Thanks,” he said, opening up the back side door.  “I’m James Brahzee.”

“Nice to meet you James, I’m Terry.”

“Angus McCloud.”

“Cool.”  James perked his head up.  “Hey, is that Aerosmith?”

“Yeah man,” said Terry.  “I got it for my birthday.”

“Nice.”

Dream on
Dream on
Dream on
Dream until your dreams come true

[#CriminalizeSobriety]

Wow, as a fellow writer I really like the attention to detail. Not sure what they've got down south but you've described what could pass as a winter morning up here.

Great work so far, man.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

What Dallas said. Also, "Dream On", a great song. In case you want to include a random MI high schooler debating with his Ron Paul loving friend (a true story, though I don't play the Paul lover), feel free.

[Pingvin]

And you can add me if you need a crazy russian Paulfan.

[MAINEiac4434]

Dream On is one of the best rock songs ever written.

This is great so far.

[Oakvale]

I don't want to be pretentious and describe myself as a 'writer', but as a fellow putter-of-words-in-sequence, this is really quite good.

I demand an appearance!

[Bacon King]

Oh. my. God.

This is pure brilliance.

[angus]

I love sticks…

Damn straight.  Aerosmith too.  The first gig my band ever got when I was a singer/guitar player/songwriter in a band in grad school was in the same venue where Aerosmith got its first gig, oddly enough.  No doubt, it's an excellent choice of bands for a the story's soundrack. 

But I drive an 2009 VW Jetta five-speed.  Never had a truck or SUV.  Although, the Ford Explorer seems more libertarian than the Jetta, and it's definitely more macho. Also, it's more likely to actually make it to the caucus on a snowy day, so it's probably a better prop for the story.

[Snowstalker Mk. II]

I'd love to get a cameo, possibly involving a meetup of several of our noted Pennsylvanians.

[Simfan34]

This is great- and I'd love to be in it.

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Put me in, please.

(If you won't, you're token minorities hater)

[angus]

Put me in, please.

(If you won't, you're token minorities hater)

Poles (from Piensk who Polka) for Paul!

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

Put me in, please.

(If you won't, you're token minorities hater)

Poles (from Piensk who Polka) for Paul!

Poles from Piensk, who are doing Polka, came to Iowa to do more Polka for Paul

[Yelnoc]

“-as that panhandle hook move up across the Midwest, another storm is brewing in the gulf.  If it moves north as expect, it will meet up with the other storm to dump snow across New England-”

Angus punched the dial and the man’s voice disappeared.  James got out of the car and followed the two men over to a brick building surrounded by tennis courts.  “Civic Center” read the plaque over the front entrance. 

“Looks like your guys are out in force, today,” remarked Terry.  At 7:00pm it was dark, but James could still make out Ron Paul paraphernalia on a number of cars in the crowded parking lot.

“Yep,” grunted Angus, rubbing his hands together to ward off the cold.  They stepped into the building and were immediately warmed by the stale air.  The room was crammed full of tables and folding chairs but all seats were taken; many caucus goers lined the walls and milled about between tables.  James split from Terry and Angus and headed towards an alcove near the back where the restrooms were.

*     *     *

A big thanks to Snowguy for helping me make the weather system work.  I definitely did not come up with that first paragraph on my own.  Don't worry, I won't leave you hanging like this tonight

[Yelnoc]

Sound of a toilet flushing.

James walked over to the sink and washed his hands.  He sniffed, grimacing.  Something smells…sweet.  Weird.  He looked to his left and saw a door with a glowing “Exit” sign over it.  Curious, James opened the door.  In rushed cold air, and on its heels the smell.  James’ draw dropped open.

Three guys were stumbling around a metal cooking pot, smoke wafting upwards from it.  One of them dropped down on his knees inhaled deeply, and then stood back up.  James scratched his head.  Why are they dancing around a…a pot-pot?  Yeah, right behind the GOP caucuses on the coldest day of winter so far?

The guy who had just inhaled shouted at James.  “Hey man!  You wanna thank the Rain God with us?” 

“Uh…no thanks.”  James turned to go back inside.

“Dude, are they about t’ vote?”  The stoner smiled wide.  James judged him to be no more than eighteen years old.

“Yeah, uh, yeah they’re about to.”

“Guess we’d better come with y',” said the stoner, motioning to his two accomplices, who began stowing the paraphernalia under bushes.  James groaned. Wonderful, just wonderful

“We did a rain dance earlier today and look!  Rain!”  The guy’s face scrunched up as he thought deeply.  “Well, snow.  But, you know, man, snow’s just, like, frozen rain.  You, know?”

“Yeah,” James nodded, resigned to his fate.  “I know.”

The stoner stuck out his hand.  “I’m Johannus.”

“James,” he replied, clasping Johannus’s limp hand.  His two accomplices had finished their work, so James sighed and led the trio into the building.

“This is Wally,” said Johannus, motioning to the younger looking of his two friends.  Wally did not acknowledge them, his attention fixed firmly on a pimple at the end of his nose.

“And this is Gus.”

Gus, who had been taking care not to step on the cracks in the tile floor, looked up at James.

“n.”

“What?”

“Nig- oof!”  Wally had punched Gus in the stomach.

“What did I tell you about that word?”

Jbrase quickened his pace.  Almost to the hall…

“Hey, dude.  You like Ron Paul?” Johannus had put his hand on James’s shoulder and was grinning like a mad man.

You’ve got to be kidding me.  “Yeah, actually, he’s who I plan on voting for.”

“Cool, man.  We were actually doing the rain dance, to drive away the other people’s infidel supporters.”

For ’s sake.  “Oh.”  James spotted Angus and Terry standing in a corner and strode over to them as quickly as he could.

[FEMA Camp Administrator]

Who's Wally? I know who Johannus and Gus must be referring to.

As well, when Michigan comes around, there may be some material I have you might want to use.

[Yelnoc]

Angus watched as James approached.  Three young guys weaved after him.  Suddenly a smell hit him.  Lighting up joints in the bathroom, eh?

“I see you’ve found some new friends.” Angus said, slyly.

James looked alarmed.  “No, no, these guys-”

“Yep!”  Johannus put his arm around James’s shoulders.  “Best friends!”

“Best friends,” muttered Wally.

There was an awkward silence.

“We were dancing for the rain god,” said Johannus, smiling widely as ever.

Angus and Terry looked at each other before bursting out laughing.

“No, it’s not…I wasn’t,” James stuttered.

Angus was bent over double, heaving.  “D-don’t worry about it.  We-we were all young once.”

Terry gasped for air, clutching his sides.  “Smoking weed too, I see!”

“No, that was them-”

“Ladies and gentlemen,” squawked a loud speaker.  Angus saw a short, older looking woman was speaking into a microphone.  “If we could go ahead and begin…ah, ok.  People are coming around with copy paper and pens, if you would please write down your preferred presidential candidate and then place them in the box once it comes around, we…can go ahead and get this over with.”

“So, what’s it gonna be?” asked Angus, looking at Terry.

Terry chuckled.  “How much you want to bet those kids over there,” motions towards the stoner trio, “are Paul supporters?”

Angus stroked his chin.  “They don’t seem old enough to be here.  Regardless, they look like Gary Johnson types.”

Terry shrugged.  “You know what?” He took the offered paper and pencil.  “Why not?”  He scribbled down a name on paper and placed it in the basket when it came around.  Everyone else did the same.

A few minutes later, the basket sat on a table in front of the female speaker.  She drew the ballots out one-by-one, read them aloud, and then placed them into piles.  “Gingrich, Paul, Paul, Romney, Santorum…”

“Looking good for us,” said Angus.

“I wonder what the other caucuses are like,” responded Terry.  This area was not at all a Paul stronghold, but it appeared the weather had kept a lot of people from coming.

“Paul,” said the lady.  She picked up another ballot. “Ni-” her face turned red and she crumpled the ballot, flinging it aside.”

“n,” giggled Gus.  Wally slapped him on the back of the head.

Terry looked over at the three stooges and then back at Angus.  “Weird.”  Angus nodded in agreement.

Five minutes later the votes had been counted.  The woman stood up, cleared her throat, and tapped the mike.

Come on, lady, tell us who won…

“It’s my pleasure to announce to night that…” she paused for dramatic effect.  “Ron Paul has won our caucus!”

Yes, aweso-

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAA, YEEEEEEEEHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWW!  WOOOOT, WOOOOT!”  Johannus was on his feet screaming.  His friends stood up and copied him, Gus yelling obscenities.  Everyone else in the room stared, mouth hanging open.  Out of the corner of his eye, Angus saw James bury his head in his hands.

“OH YEAAAAAH!” shouted Wally, running towards the bathrooms.  His friends followed.  Everyone staid frozen for another minute, not sure what to think.

Angus tapped James on the shoulder.  “Come on, let’s get you home.”

As the three of them left the building, they spotted one of the stooges slipping around in the icy parking lot, the metal pot askew on his head.

“I’m telling you Angus, you Ron Paul people are weird.”

“They’re definitely Johnson people, trust me.”

[Yelnoc]

So, are there any other loose ends that need tying, or can I move on to New Hampshire (after releasing the state-wide results of course)?

Who's Wally? I know who Johannus and Gus must be referring to.

As well, when Michigan comes around, there may be some material I have you might want to use.

Take a guess.  And sure, PM me about it.

[angus]

Yep, the Rain God people were definitely Johnson supporters.  But Angus McCloud might have surreptitiously attempted to sway them toward Ron Paul in some unnoticed moment, and perhaps that made just enough difference to explain the result.  

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

Johannus is obviously JCL.

This is based on the "A Snowstorm in Iowa" thread from 2012, right?

[CatoMinor]

[Yelnoc]

Johannus is obviously JCL.

This is based on the "A Snowstorm in Iowa" thread from 2012, right?

That's what inspired it.

[Simfan34]

I hope I get to live in New Hampshire.