Suicide

[Beet]

What drives people who seemingly have plenty going for them, to suicide? It's remarkable how normal people can seem, and how their friends and family think they're fine, and then all of a sudden they're dead in some gruesome way. I know some people say it's a cowardly way out, but I think it takes courage to off yourself successfully. The will to live and fear of death is very strong in ordinary people. And dying is painful and-- particularly bleeding and suffocating methods-- often rather slow. I've been in the place where everything was black, my world shrunk down to nothing, and I cared for neither tomorrow or anything outside my room, couldn't get up out of bed or speak to anyone, but in those times self-harm did not occur to me. I'm not sure anyone who has not been there can truly understand it, but perhaps someone on the forum has some thoughts.

[Beet]

Thanks everyone for the interesting replies here so far.

I would like to add that I have seriously thought things that most people would consider mad-- for example, at one point in my life I really believed that world events were influenced by things such as whether or not I wanted them to happen. It's not all that different from prayer, really. At another time I believed that there was some invisible force acting against me, conspiring to make my life a living hell, and I couldn't shake that belief until I was able to grasp in my mind some specific things that happened to me in which I was lucky. I've also had personal habits over the years that if you had told me before I developed these habits, I would not have believed you, nor did I believe it as I was developing them. I have at least two mental conditions which I believe are not really diagnosed as an acknowledged conditions, although more common conditions similar to them have been.

The human mind is an incredibly versatile thing. The diversity you will find out there is amazing. 'Society' is just a caricature of where our minds can meet in the real world and find some semblance of common ground, but there's a lot there which you don't see.