The Comedy Goldmine

[King]

That was probably the first J. J. intentional joke that made me laugh

[Oakvale]

You are a gay?

Yeah. But I don't give a f[inks] about guys' weight either.

Bears?

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

I'm sorry, but any process that might allow Paulites to become unfaithful electors is not "democracy."

The electoral college isn't democracy anyways.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

He's not wrong, you know.

[Queen Mum Inks.LWC]

He's not wrong, you know.

I know.  It was between posting it in the comedy thread or the "oh snap" thread, but I found it more funny than "oh snap"-y

[CatoMinor]

i don't care as long as you drop this romney gimmick.

I'm sure he will the moment your leftist phase ends

[tmthforu94]

I'm sorry, Idaho, but I got to:

I just got a private message, unsolicited, from clarence of a very very large woman in a bikini. Has anyone else experienced this kind of thing? I don't particularly care, but it is weird.

i have and i want it to stop cause my moms overweight and i have a Girlfriend...

[Grumpier Than Thou]

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?topic=161419.0

[Phony Moderate]

https://uselectionatlas.org/FORUM/index.php?board=68.0

[Mr. Morden]

On Bushie's untruthfullness about how much weight he's lost:

Don't you guys ever visit the polling boards? Never trust numbers with decimal points.

[Mr. Morden]

*Bump*, since the other thread was locked.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

She interrupted Romney 28 times, and gave Obama 4 minutes more speaking time, and slanted all the questions to help Obama.

She fulfilled her mission perfectly.

A+

[The world will shine with light in our nightmare]

We really should have Dick Morris on ignore by this point.

[Joe Republic]

No black president has ever been re-elected. Obama is done for.

[Keystone Phil]

After all of that drama surrounding the locking of The Institute, it just ended up being locked anyway.   I'm glad we could at least enjoy a few more weeks there. This will never be the same.

[Insula Dei]

Why would you start this? You didn't close the old one did you??  Where is Keyston Phil?

Weirdly fitting.

[I spent the winter writing songs about getting better]

What I've learned from this board: major players in the 2012 Presidential race include Arlen Specter and Fidel Castro.

[Antonio the Sixth]

First University of Colorado statisticians and now a squirrel!

[MASHED POTATOES. VOTE!]

This is a rogue thread.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

Caffeine and alcohol.

And I drunk alcohol while underage (20) in the United States in August. Rebel.

Thug life.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

Herman's favorite pizza is the meat combo. Because a) he "looooves meat"

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

Dear 2012 board,
Keep this clean because I want saboteurs and wreckers to be kind and considerate to those who disagree with the moderators of this disaster. Paul Ryan is from Janesville, where they apologize for producing Paul Ryan. A man of three words only – Packers and cheese-heads, with his enormous ears and suits. Joe Biden’s left arm is muscular and old, but he uses it well. It’s over. I don’t understand Mitt Romney’s positions. They are wondrously erotic and strange on any issue. He said he is severely conservative, but practices polygamy. “I enjoy curves,” he told supporters, and supporters vomited. Romney flip-flopped immediately, and flip-flopped again. Whips and chains are really fun to use on practicing Mormons who believe that the six wives of Barack Hussein Obama are really Romney’s. Hillary Clinton’s beauty does not exist. Who knew that Xahar was dropped from American Idol as a kid because he sucked certain things that kids should not have knowledge of, unless they have very bad parents? Qaddafi’s Nescafe drugs were consumed by Mustafa Abdul Jalil. Mitt Romney condemned the public display of apartheid memorabilia due to his father’s decision to brainwash his son. Sometimes I wonder about the virtue, or lack thereof, associated with doing many drugs. Cthulhu is rumored to endorse safe sex. Vote Cthulhu ’16! Because big black boxes of balloons will otherwise be considered morally objectionable. The three moderators are on my black list, so get Dave Leip to agree to fire them all. I hereby declare, “YOU ARE FIRED!!!!” A magic potion made me feel high as a balloon. Jill Stein really loves attention, but she is Kalwejt’s secret lover. A grilled bratwurst tastes so good. For heaven’s sake, please refrain from yanking on your yang-yang in public, because Simfan34 is not amused by that or similar activities that dismay Mike Naso, who used to be a homosexual, but won’t admit it, just like Grumps, who doesn’t realize that the election actually depends on increased racism among the white working-class, by the power of Jesus Almighty. Mitt Romney is rumored to be surprisingly talented at playing bass guitar and raping large companies of profit. Contrary to popular belief, Mormonism is a life of crime and murder, which only recently has been proscribed because of its government-like secrecy concerning unusual sexual practices, such as dragon sex, which is frightening, yet delicious with some cream. The cream is known to cause liberals to feel itchy in some very sensitive areas. Very many thanks; this board sucks just like Grumps. Tell Sarah Palin that her daughters are the most homophobic little Alaskans and trampy bitches to have ever gotten such large amounts of attention. Eight gallons of man juice ran through Politico, because Mitt Romney was in jail once. Tell the Moderators to ban Grumps right f[Inks]g now! Postscript: Done. Nym. By the way, Grumps is wonderful; nah, just kidding. Sometimes Grumps uses a nasty bunch of trampy young blondes to pleasure his randomly enlarged attitude regarding the entire rear of Hillary. My big black statue of David is beautiful as Hillary quick-stepping with a certain Chicagoan Mayor known as ‘Hillary Rodham’s behind the curtain’. Finally, Hillary is nude planning a copper, but Clarence decided to put his lengthy, aged opinion inside a hole of ignorance. Nevertheless, this whole thread is a pathetic disgusting piece of Skylarks, fighting a pointless war that Sirnick has won. The f[Inks]g END!

Sincerely,
Forum Community

[Grumpier Than Thou]

So give us an example, Mr. Critic.

The cesarian scene in Prometheus does not count.

[Grumpier Than Thou]

Benefit Romney? Hardly. Muslims and Arabs will vote for one of their own.

Nader's not running this time.

[Oswald Acted Alone, You Kook]

Context needed.

One of these is said to be a surprisingly readable book that would probably be considered comedy if its author had not managed to put the ideas in it into practice. So yeah, that one.