Update Season VIII - "Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!"

[opebo]

" a couple ham sandwiches"

lol

What's with all the hatred on ham sandwiches?  The typical 'prepared at home' ham sandwich is a thin, weak affair, and two of them would be necessary to make a reasonable dinner for an adult.

[opebo]

There being "no time" for something while unemployed is pretty offensive.

Not so, PK.  It isn't offensive to help you understand how bad your life is.  Perhaps it is not too late to make some changes. 

[opebo]

I am telling the truth.  Yes, I am eating right at 1500 kcal a day.  I'm not eating healthier, just eating less.

That's smart, Bushie.  Most of what these know-it-alls think they know about what is 'healthy' is perfect nonsense or just fads they see on the media.

Eggs, red meat, fatty fish and green leafy vegetables are the way to go - its obvious to any thinking man.  Maybe cashews and pistachios for snacks.

[opebo]

Good evening, folks!  I am home from a good dinner with my Kenya team.  I didn't eat particularly healthy, so I will likely gain just a bit in the morning.  Oh well, gotta shake it off and get back to it tomorrow.  I had a cheeseburger with a few fries, Diet Dr Pepper, and a big scoop of Vanilla Ice Cream for dessert.  That's probably 1500-1800 calories.  Oh well.  I did pretty good the few days before that, and I'll get back to the diet tomorrow.  It's just a one day fluke.  No sweat.

Go out for a 'mightnight run' in the moonlight, Bushie, and you'll work a lot of that off.  Oklahoma will look a lot better in the luminescence.

[opebo]

People actually put ketchup on pasta?!

I think its fairly common unless you have a Mediterranean background.

Dukey and I are Greek, and Phil's Italian, so you might be onto something there.

No, I don't think he is - my family are as pale and WASPy as they come, and such a bizarre and sick idea never occurred to any of them. 

[opebo]

...Currywurst on them. I thought it must be some cool fusion that would be amazing. Nope. Regular American style hotdog with ketchup and curry powder on it. So gross!  

Currywurst isn't bad.

Bushie you were wearing your seatbelt right?

I highly doubt that Bushie wears his seatbelt at all.

Are you kidding - this kid takes all the precautions.  He's a very cautious fellow.

Is his weird sleep schedule messing with his metabolism and making him fatter?

Bad sleep schedules can do that!?!?

Oh man

You really didn't know this?  In my opinion getting up early in the morning is the primary cause of obesity/overweight.

[opebo]

Bad sleep schedules can do that!?!?

Oh man

I hope not. Otherwise my metabolism is going to abruptly grind to a halt one of these days.

It doesn't otherwise I would be of blimp proportions by now... though I have gained weight recently so...

You probably don't understand what is a 'bad' sleep schedule - a bad sleep schedule is to get up early in the morning and work all day.  To stay up late and sleep all day is the healthy one.  It helps if you never toil.

[opebo]

I also get migraines... My triggers are over-tiredness and stress... and they are actually one of the most common set of trigger factors.

Precisely.  Migraines are caused by modern capitalist exploitation.

[opebo]

I find it very hard to believe than only 1 or 2 percent of adult American males have a 'BMI' over 40.  I remember about half of the population looked obese when I was there last.

And about the dog - who would a dog inside the house?  Its filthy.  Cats are bad enough - we used to tolerate them sometimes, but they were kept outside most of the time.  Nowadays I wouldn't consider getting any pet.

[opebo]

Maybe I could change the story line.  It generates 500 posts a week or so, 450 of those at least are diet related.  If my viewers will let me, I could try to change the story line that doesn't generate 90% of the Update.

Stop.

Well, it makes sense. Its a lot easier to change the story line than changing his life.

The fact that he views this all as "seasons" with "story-lines" is slightly disturbing and shows he just doesn't get it but that's not news I suppose.

He gets it.  You boobs don't, but he does.

[opebo]

I will be having left over steak from Sunday at 18:15 and will be watching Texas Rangers baseball at 19:00 followed by the News at 22:00 and Jay Leno at 22:30.

Jay Leno is still on television?!

You should take the dog for a walk.

Indeed.  Bushie, dogs need real exercise.  As in, you need to walk them.  Are you ever going to walk Blondie?

we know the answer to that question.  blondie is sweltering outside.

If Bushie's going to both leave the dog outside all day and never walk it, then he should try to find a new owner for the dog who'll actually take care of it properly.

Guys, think about what you're saying - the dog lives outside.  Why would it need to be 'walked'?  

You may be urbanites, but surely you can reason: rural dogs living outside exercise themselves.  'Walking the dog' is just for apartment dwellers and such, a chance for the dog to urinate and for the owner to grasp his turd with a plastic bag over the hand.  In other words dog-walking is for dumbs.

[opebo]

Good Tuesday Morning!  Kenya 2013 begins THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW!!!

Have you packed American Condoms?

[opebo]

Why don't you drink water, Bushie?

Laziness; preferring the taste of carbonated syrup over the fresh taste of water.

A mixture of carbonated water + (most kinds of) juice tastes quite better than either, imo.

Ugh, I hate fruit juice.  As usual Bushie's right on this one.

[opebo]

Guys the dog can go lay under a bush or in the forest, or under a porch, or whatnot.  We had dogs all through my youth and not a one of them was allowed in the house.  I suppose we did have doghouses but that is more for the winter, not the summertime.

 

[opebo]

it's common courtesy not to be a busybody in another man's matters.

One thing these threads should've taught you Bushie is not to expect common courtesy from these forum know-it-alls.

[opebo]

What the heck is wrong with keeping a cat and dog inside the house together?!  You do know that dogs - especially puppies - can go through this wonderful program called 'training'?

Its filthy enough in there already with a cat, they don't want to add a dog.  Personally I would suggest tossing the cat outside before I'd recommend bringing the hound inside.

Animals are bad for you with all that hair and dirt.

[opebo]

it's common courtesy not to be a busybody in another man's matters.

One thing these threads should've taught you Bushie is not to expect common courtesy from these forum know-it-alls.

It's also common courtesy not to ramble about one's personal life in the company of strangers. If Bushie doesn't want people calling him out as a scumbag animal abuser and alerting the authorities, maybe he shouldn't brag about his revolting behavior on the internet.

His behavior is absolutely fine.  You all are the revolting ones.

[opebo]

If you weren't neglecting the puppy you would bring him inside like a normal pet owner.

This. That's why Lief is right as well.

Why would you bring a dog inside your house?  What are we, savages?

Next you'll have him housing swine there as well.

[opebo]

His behavior is absolutely fine.  You all are the revolting ones.

If Bushie sits in his parents' trailer fapping in front of the TV all day, that's his business. When his pathetic act causes harm to an innocent creature, it's another matter entirely.

Its an animal, they do normal live in some proximity to 'nature'!  You think dogs evolved in air-conditioning?  Or lack the instinct to lay down under a bush if they are hot?  

This is just a classist feeding frenzy guys, you all need to calm down.

[opebo]

He's rationalizing his implicit abuse. This is terrible.

No, you are all just engaging in a witch hunt.

[opebo]

Opebo being the knight in shining armor defending Bushie is an endearing twist to Season 8

Two guys who don't live in the real world. Makes sense.

Your reality, sir, is lies and balderdash and I'm delighted to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever.

[opebo]

While I agree the dog needs some socialization and shelter, it would be nice to see the Forum half as outraged about the conditions of the human characters in the story. Daddy works 60 hours a week just to keep the family in a trailer. How about some indignation about that situation?

They're just blinded by their stupid belief in free will and choices and all that sort of right-wing rot.

[opebo]

[Speaking of right-wing, I'm starting to think you're drifting back that way, what with the plutocratic rate you are charging for your services lately, eating in fancy restaurants.......soon you'll be like  Torie.  

Haha, no, think of me as a loyal member of the Farang Union, demanding a Fair Wage.  Very left wing.  Today I had a decent foot massage and then a visit to a Soapy, total cost, about 2 hours and 15 minutes of my income.  (it so happened that neither were great, but still, my hours do go pretty far I guess).

[opebo]

Are there no laws in Kenya requiring qualifications to work in a medical clinic or in construction? The idea of Bushie (or me) doing either is tremendously reckless.

Construction for sure there will be no qualifications in 'developing' countries (and to be honest I doubt there are many in the US outside urban-unionized cores).  As for the clinic I guess there would be but they'll probably be routinely ignored as there is unlikely to be any enforcement - he'll probably just be giving sponge baths or something like that.

[opebo]

Bushie, you do realize water doesn't reduce the sugar you've eaten or drank nor does it reduce the amount of calories you've eaten, correct? Drinking a coke is drinking a coke. There's no "okay" way to drink it versus a bad way.

Well, that is, other than vomiting it up after drinking it, n'est-ce pas?