Update XVIII: 15 Miles From Lunch

[Joe Biden 2020]

Bushie, do you plan on using your Tulsa apartment as a weekend love cave for a potential new woman? Perhaps finally create a Bushie Jr. to get your child tax credit going?

I might, if there were a woman on the radar.  So far, there is not.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Jeff. What are you going to do to start thriving instead of simply surviving?

I am going to go to work everyday and put everything I have into my new job.  I will hang out with my church family in both OKC and Tulsa when I can, so long as it doesn't interfere with my job.  My job comes first.  I will also continue to hang out with my biological family as we are a very close knit group.  I will also continue to read my Bible every night (though I've slacked off the past few weeks) and see what God has to say to me each night.

I would suggest you try the daily list to hold yourself accountable to progress. "Putting everything I have into my job" is a pipe dream without actions to determine what it takes to reach that level.

I've already mentioned a couple times what I am going to differently.  I am not going to repeat it again.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Among the litany of issues you may have Jeff, execution is chief among them.

You do have a vision for yourself -- from what I can tell, it's to be an independent provider, a head-of-household who puts in a Dick van Dyke style day, comes home after a solid eight hours to trip over the ottoman and into the arms of your housewife and your 2.4 children, waiting for you in your modest ranch-style house with the white picket fence.

The problem is, vision without execution is worthless. Anyone can say that they know they need to practice the skills they need to build a career. Anyone can say they need to exercise and lose weight. In fact, anyone can set an arbitrary goal associated with their vision -- even baby steps -- and if they don't actually do anything to work toward that goal or vision, it's worthless.

Jeff -- this is largely your modus operandi.

If you're ever, ever, ever going to pull yourself out of this seemingly endless cycle, you'll need to actually follow through toward your vision. Based on your work performance, I suspect that your actual execution on the job is more like the type of person who hopes to hide in the workplace and hope the boss never notices you, rather than someone who is actually interested in building a career.

You're not wrong to believe in yourself, and while I don't think you're anywhere near a good judge of your own abilities, it's not wrong to have a dream. But you're painfully bad at actually following through on, well, anything.

You ought to try something very simple in order to start making progress. This is an old story about (I believe) Andrew Carnegie. Each night before you go to bed, take a 3x5 notecard and write the five most important things that you can do the next day, and rank them in order of importance.

My guess is that this list would never include "Watching four football games" or "Eat at Braums." The list should be meaningful and important things that help you build toward your vision. Make the first (as an example):

1. Spend one hour doing AutoCADD training on Lynda.com
2. Take a 20-minute walk
3. Go to the grocery store and buy a week's worth of fruits and vegetables
4. Call and email contacts at CADD school to ask about potential connections for the job search
5. Research how to sublease your Tulsa apartment, in the event you land a job in OKC

At the beginning of each day, review your list and knock off the items one by one. Make sure these items build toward larger goals and, ultimately, your vision.

Jeff, I do hope you treat this opportunity better than the last and actually follow through on bettering yourself. Scoring a new position is not the end of your challenge; it's the beginning.

Will you at least try this method for a period of time (not say "that's a good idea!" and immediately dismiss or tell us "I'll think about it," but actually do it)? You can post your top five here and use the forum as an accountability tool, which would be an incredible benefit to you.

Now is about actions, not words or optimism or warm fuzzies or delusion. Action. What will you do to ensure your success from here on out?

What I am going to do differently is play with my AutoCAD every evening.  Like King suggested, I'm going to block off 45 minutes most every evening except Wednesday to play with it distraction free.  I will try to keep it at the same time or close to the same time every evening so it's easier to maintain.  While on the job, I will also pay more attention to detail and pay as close of attention as I can while they train me.  I want to do everything within my power to prove myself worthy of going the full contract and being put on another contract.  I learned a lot of things from my previous opportunity and plan to make a lot of changes.  This is not by any means an exhaustive list of things I'm going to do.  I've got a whole list worth that would take a couple long posts.  Instead, suffice it to say that I am going to take this job much more seriously than I did the last job.

[Joe Biden 2020]

J-Mann, I will do things how I see fit to do them.  I can't promise to follow your checklist entirely.

[Joe Biden 2020]

bushie it sounds like you are just going to be a burden on poor granny.

I have to have a place to stay and I can't afford rent at two apartments, and I am not going to sublease the Tulsa Apartment, so I can't see how you can say something so outrageous, when you know darn well that will not be the case.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Gustaf, it's clear you don't like me.  You have the right to like who you want.  I must disagree that I'm not trying to be a good person.  With the risk of bringing faith into this, I am doing my best to worship and honor and glorify my God.  I fall short in many, many areas, and I have never said I'm perfect and have never meant I'm better than anybody else.  You are right that I'm not a good person.  There is no one good, except God, in the truest sense of the word that He created.  He is the only definition of good.  Our definitions of what is good and our good works are indeed filthy rags in His sight.  That's why I'm so thankful for His grace that has cleansed me from all unrighteousness and has saved me from eternity in hell.  I know that through the lens of Christ's blood, I am seen as spotless.  That's the only way I can enter heaven.

I appreciate your honesty, and I've always respected you as a moderator because I've always seen you as fair even to those you do not personally like.

Yours truly,

Bushie

[Joe Biden 2020]

Gustaf, it's clear you don't like me.  You have the right to like who you want.  I must disagree that I'm not trying to be a good person.  With the risk of bringing faith into this, I am doing my best to worship and honor and glorify my God.  I fall short in many, many areas, and I have never said I'm perfect and have never meant I'm better than anybody else.  You are right that I'm not a good person.  There is no one good, except God, in the truest sense of the word that He created. He is the only definition of good.  Our definitions of what is good and our good works are indeed filthy rags in His sight.  That's why I'm so thankful for His grace that has cleansed me from all unrighteousness and has saved me from eternity in hell.  I know that through the lens of Christ's blood, I am seen as spotless.  That's the only way I can enter heaven.

I appreciate your honesty, and I've always respected you as a moderator because I've always seen you as fair even to those you do not personally like.

Yours truly,

Bushie

The only definition of ultimate goodness (for a Christian), but clearly there are good people out there and you make it too easy for yourself by just emphasising the dichotomy between God and us sinful humans. You cold clearly get much closer to being a good person and act less egotistical - be careful not to use God as an excuse for not pursuing any self improvement.

I will admit I am a very prideful person by nature.  It's one of the things I struggle with.  It is hard for me to act less egotistical, but I am trying.  I just fail way too many times and repeat the same mistakes over and over.  I take 3 steps forward and 2 1/2 steps back many times.  When I come across as egotistical, it's because it is something I am dealing with between me and God.  As the children's song goes "Don't judge me, yet, there's an unfinished part.  He's still working on me.".  God is still working on me, chiseling away the bad and molding me into the Jeff that He has called me to be.  I'm a tough project and my God is the only one that truly knows me and the only one who can properly mold me and make me.  He knows me better than I know myself (the forum says "Amen", LOL).  He will be working on me until the day I am called home to heaven and receive that perfect, immortal body that is waiting for me.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Hence the issue with people like Bushie. They don't make plans or work incrementally towards goals, because they think there is an individual plan that God has determined. Why work on yourself, when God will do it for you?

it is a team effort.  God and me.

[Joe Biden 2020]

J-Mann,  I will get more specific when I actually get into the job and figure out what I need to work on.  For now, I can only be general and vague.  Pay attention to detail is as specific as I can get at this point.

Look guys, I was just trying to be honest and candid with Gustaf and politicus.  Why did I get attacked for that?

[Joe Biden 2020]

I found a fourth pair of pants, so it looks like I won't have to go shopping, which means I won't need my aunt to take them up.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Hence the issue with people like Bushie. They don't make plans or work incrementally towards goals, because they think there is an individual plan that God has determined. Why work on yourself, when God will do it for you?

it is a team effort.  God and me.

Then one of you clearly isn't pulling his weight. And since God doesn't make mistakes, that leaves you by process of elimination. Last I checked, Jeff, Christ didn't sleep for 11 hours a day and gorge himself on fried foods and mooch off the room/board/food/kindness/money of his relatives. Christ had to spend several hours nailed to a cross with a crown of thorns on his head while being mocked and jeered by his captors. You started crying like a little girl when a cat scratched you.

So please spare us your sanctimony. You use your religion to justify all of your completely preventable personal failures. Through the lens of Christ's blood you're spotless? That's just a holier-than-thou way of saying, "Bushie can never fail. Bushie can only be failed."

You completely missed my point and completely misread my post.  I never said I'm flawless.  I struggle like every other human being.  Through the lens of Christ's blood He sees every Christian as spotless, not just me.  You are making me out to be more egotistical than I am.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I am very excited about this job.  If I do it correctly, it could lead into a major breakthrough in my career.  Instead of predicting my failure, continue to give me constructive advice on how to do it correctly like J-Mann has done.  I still may push back, but I do read and ponder what you post.  This is a huge opportunity for me and I can't afford to screw it up.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Gustaf, it's clear you don't like me.  You have the right to like who you want.  I must disagree that I'm not trying to be a good person.  With the risk of bringing faith into this, I am doing my best to worship and honor and glorify my God.  I fall short in many, many areas, and I have never said I'm perfect and have never meant I'm better than anybody else.  You are right that I'm not a good person.  There is no one good, except God, in the truest sense of the word that He created. He is the only definition of good.  Our definitions of what is good and our good works are indeed filthy rags in His sight.  That's why I'm so thankful for His grace that has cleansed me from all unrighteousness and has saved me from eternity in hell.  I know that through the lens of Christ's blood, I am seen as spotless.  That's the only way I can enter heaven.

I appreciate your honesty, and I've always respected you as a moderator because I've always seen you as fair even to those you do not personally like.

Yours truly,

Bushie

The only definition of ultimate goodness (for a Christian), but clearly there are good people out there and you make it too easy for yourself by just emphasising the dichotomy between God and us sinful humans. You cold clearly get much closer to being a good person and act less egotistical - be careful not to use God as an excuse for not pursuing any self improvement.

I will admit I am a very prideful person by nature.  It's one of the things I struggle with.  It is hard for me to act less egotistical, but I am trying.  I just fail way too many times and repeat the same mistakes over and over.  I take 3 steps forward and 2 1/2 steps back many times.  When I come across as egotistical, it's because it is something I am dealing with between me and God.  As the children's song goes "Don't judge me, yet, there's an unfinished part.  He's still working on me.".  God is still working on me, chiseling away the bad and molding me into the Jeff that He has called me to be.  I'm a tough project and my God is the only one that truly knows me and the only one who can properly mold me and make me.  He knows me better than I know myself (the forum says "Amen", LOL).  He will be working on me until the day I am called home to heaven and receive that perfect, immortal body that is waiting for me.

And here's the root of it all: he has been conditioned to believe he will be given everything that he wants.

That's a biblical promise, not a personal, made-up wish.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I am very excited about this job.  If I do it correctly, it could lead into a major breakthrough in my career.  Instead of predicting my failure, continue to give me constructive advice on how to do it correctly like J-Mann has done.  I still may push back, but I do read and ponder what you post.  This is a huge opportunity for me and I can't afford to screw it up.

Then accept the guidance.

I'd expect pushback if I advised you to murder your parents or convert to Islam. I find it far more difficult to accept pushback when I'm offering you simple methods to excel at work and manage your own life better.

Success requires discipline, not hope.

I'm trying.  Again, I'm struggling with pride.  I do hear your advice and I will implement as many of them as I can.  I have to determine what will fit best with my own life and my own goals and dreams.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Where did Bushie learn to be so prideful?

More importantly, where did he get the idea that he has the right, let alone justification to be prideful?

Where did I justify my pridefulness?  The past few posts have been admitting I have a problem that I'm dealing with (pride).

[Joe Biden 2020]

Where did Bushie learn to be so prideful?

More importantly, where did he get the idea that he has the right, let alone justification to be prideful?

I assume it is something to do with his religious beliefs. He does, after all, think that as long as he accepts Jesus as his savior, he can do, say and act in any way he wants without any ramifications. Hence why he doesn't feel any guilt for his pride, his slothfulness, and his gluttony.

Again, where did I convey I do not feel guilt for my pride?  You must not be able to read.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Jeff, you've admitted before that you don't really know how to use the AutoCADD program that your parents bought for you. What concrete steps are you taking to address this issue? Or will you just continue to "play" around with it while watching football and pretend that doing that will really help you to grasp the material (even though it is utterly pointless)?

I don't think it's even pridefulness that is stoping Jeff from trying J-Mann's list method. I think it's sheer laziness.

Why am I being attacked for using the word "play"?  I am in no way implying I won't take it seriously, but it is not going to consume my entire evening.  45 minutes MAX.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Does Granny have the high end cable package you have in Tulsa? 

She has a sufficient cable package.  If I want to watch a different channel that she doesn't have, I can have my mother DVR it on her Direct TV and then I can go over there and watch it since she only lives 5 1/2 miles from Grandma.

[Joe Biden 2020]

bushie it sounds like you are just going to be a burden on poor granny.

I have to have a place to stay and I can't afford rent at two apartments, and I am not going to sublease the Tulsa Apartment, so I can't see how you can say something so outrageous, when you know darn well that will not be the case.

Keeping the Tulsa apartment is smart since this job is only 3 months........but Granny will be cooking 3 meals a day, extra laundry, extra cleaning, extra utilities, and your constantly visiting never ending supply of wayward aunts and uncles to make dinners for.  Poor Granny, indeed.

I will do my own laundry while I'm there and I will help fix dinner.  Her other daughter and son-in-law will be coming through October 30 and leaving November 4 and then her niece and nephew will be coming through November 12-15.  After that, there won't be any company until the aunt and uncle come back through in March to celebrate his dad's 90th birthday.  They only come through to check on their elderly parents.  My aunt always does the cooking and cleaning while she visits and invites his dad over for most of the meals so as to feed them at one time.  Grandma and his dad only live 6 miles apart.  Grandma (aunt's mom) will be 89 in April and his dad will be 90 in March.  Grandma is still strong, but her short-term memory is starting to slip and his dad can no longer drive or see or hear that well.  Part of my duties while I live with her will be to help take care of her and make sure she's okay and be an extra set of eyes and ears for Mom incase she needs help.  The time will come that Grandma will no longer be able to live alone.  For now, though, she is doing great for an 88 1/2 year old other than a little slip in the memory.  I'll be waiting on her some as she waits on me some.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Jeff, you've admitted before that you don't really know how to use the AutoCADD program that your parents bought for you. What concrete steps are you taking to address this issue? Or will you just continue to "play" around with it while watching football and pretend that doing that will really help you to grasp the material (even though it is utterly pointless)?

I don't think it's even pridefulness that is stoping Jeff from trying J-Mann's list method. I think it's sheer laziness.

Why am I being attacked for using the word "play"?  I am in no way implying I won't take it seriously, but it is not going to consume my entire evening.  45 minutes MAX.

That alone says you don't take it seriously. Spending a max amount of time means you don't like it to do it at all. It's like saying I'm going to spend 45 minutes MAX scrubbing the bathroom. You shouldn't have a set timer on how much CAD you're going to do today. 45 minutes (we said an hour but okay, nickel and dime it down as usual) should be your general suggestion, but if you get caught up in something that will take you 52 minutes, you shouldn't quit when the bell rings. This is why you failed at your last job.

Oh, definitely, if I get caught up in something, I will indeed finish what I'm working on, instead of cutting it off at the 45 or 60 minute mark (I haven't decided which).

And, she will know that I will be doing stuff for work in the evenings, so she'll know not to bother me.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I certainly don't expect her to wait on me at all, but you have to understand, I have to have a place to stay while I'm working.

[Joe Biden 2020]

I certainly don't expect her to wait on me at all, but you have to understand, I have to have a place to stay while I'm working.

Yes, but it's not like you didn't have the option. You're just too lazy/socially anxious to entertain the option of subleasing your apartment in Tulsa and using the money to get an apartment in OKC.

The reason I didn't sublease is that there are things I still want to do in Tulsa, that being the monthly church fellowship on Saturday's and I'll need/want a place to sleep Friday night and/or Saturday night.  I would be getting creamed on here if I book a hotel room for one of those events, so the next best place to stay is my own apartment.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Oh goodness. He's keeping an apartment there for his parents to pay for so he can go to church sometimes on the weekends? This is the problem. He is constantly signing leases in other cities before he really establishes himself at a job and then refuses to sublease it so his parents won't have to continue to pay rent. He's just sooooooo incredibly selfish it's amazing!

One thing you need to realize is I'll be making $15 an hour, so most of it will be my money, not my parents'.  I know this is not what people would normally do, but I don't have to do what everybody else does in order to be right.  This is our decision, and there is nothing wrong with our decision.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Terminating the lease might not be a bad idea. His credit rating is terrible anyway.

That would be even more silly.  As of right now, I plan on returning to Tulsa after this job ends, unless I am kept onto a new contract after this one expires.  I am not counting on that, naturally, but I do plan to return to Tulsa if my employment is not extended.  By then, I will have 3-6 additional months of experience which when added to the 2 months I already have, could prove very valuable when applying for other jobs.  My goal is for this job is to go at least 4 months, that is through the beginning of March, so I can put down a full 6 months of experience.  I want it to go as far as it can, naturally, but I am praying for at least 4 months.

The fact that I plan to return to Tulsa is part of the reason I'm not messing with a sublease.  I want to be able to control my apartment and come back immediately after the job ends so as to not waste any time on the job search.

[Joe Biden 2020]

Bushie, will you at least cancel the cable package when you don't live there at all?

Realize every month that one entire week of your work will be spent on the rent and utilities at a place you don't live in at all. Perhaps more than a week when factoring in gas.

I thought about cancelling the cable package, but that would incur a huge disconnect fee that it wouldn't be worth it.  I called today about downgrading, but the agent spoke to me honestly and said I currently have $175 in discounts and if I take items away, I lose the discounts and that could likely cause my bill to actually skyrocket.  So, it's more cost effective to keep it as is.  That's okay with me because I will be come up here every other Friday after work and spend the night and watch some football and go back to Grandma's Saturday evening.