Lisa From Alaska

[President Johnson]

Wow, great job. The Trump quotes read very realistic, just the way the god emperor is actually talking.

Where did you get that CNN screen from?

[Progressive]

NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY RESULTS

100% REPORTING
Lisa Murkowski    49.6%
Donald Trump*    46.3%

Granite State gut punch delivered to President Trump as Senator Murkowski pulls off a decisive victory in its Republican Primary. Aides to President Trump, who spent primary night in New Hampshire, report that the President is furious with campaign manager Kellyanne Conway, who he now suspects of working with the RNC to usurp the nomination from him.

In a speech to supporters in New Hampshire, Senator Murkowski delivered powerful remarks. "President Trump, what happened tonight was no accident. The verdict is in. Your presidency has been a failure to our country, and tonight, we realize it has been a major setback for our party. Luckily, conservatives and Republicans across beautiful and snowy New Hampshire have chosen another path. I'm so humbled to be your pick for president."

But President Trump would not accept defeat. In a thrashing, brief statement to supporters in New Hampshire, Trump said the following: "Looks like Little Lisa worked with Democrats and, well they said I shouldn't say this but I'm gonna' say it because I won't lie to anybody, believe me folks, Massachusetts chose an Alaskan tonight. Liberals from western Massachusetts--by the way, they say lots of Subarus you know what that means two ladies coming together in their Massachusetts Subaru, you know. They came up here. And they pulled off what the illegals could only dream of. These results, and they are what they are, but I won't play nice with fraud I'll tell that. Someone tell Little Lisa from Alaska that. Nothing more to say other than thank you for New Hampshire people choosing me, Massachusetts people--those women with the buzz cuts and the biker jackets if you catch my drift, they see one of their own in Lisa I guess.  The results should be void and everybody knows it."

Fallout to come, next.

[America Needs R'hllor]

I love how crazy and unhinged, yet so realistic, you write Trump.

[Bidenworth2020]

I love how crazy and unhinged, yet so realistic, you write Trump.

too true. best post yet?

[Progressive]

Thanks everyone!

NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY FALLOUT

On February 15, 2020, a few days before the South Carolina primary, President Trump addressed Republican bigs at the National Press Club.

"Look folks, I have on good word that Democrats may have been up to 8% or more of the New Hampshire Republican primary vote and to be honest with you probably more. Much more in fact. Many many aides have told me and shown me real reports about how Lisa Murkowski or whatever her name is, is using alt-Left agitators to swarm Republican primaries. South Carolina is in a few days folks. In 2016 we killed it, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio got shlonged not that Marco minded but Ted I almost felt bad for you know he's a good guy, a bit off, but he's with us. [Cruz was in the audience and nodded accordingly]. But there's a danger with Lisa Murkowski she's running a very dangerous campaign that is going to result in outsourcing jobs and importing liabilities from the Middle East if she gets her way. And folks she's going to try to get her way. So I spoke to Ronna [Romney McDaniel] and she told me that the GOP primaries are secure but let's face it. Who made the party? Before me. Before us I mean. We made this party what it is today. We won't be denied our own nomination. I need everyone in South Carolina to be on the lookout for Lisa and her liberal frauds. That's what I'll say about that."

The next day, thousands of pro-Trump protesters surrounded all twelve Lisa Murkowski field offices in South Carolina, demanding the Alaska senator drop out of the race and make room for the embattled president. Trump's South Carolina state director explained that protesters are "ensuring the voice of the people is heard. The voice of the people is with President Trump. And our campaign supporters will not allow a pro-illegal immigrant, anti-common sense senator from the swampiest depths of DC to make South Carolina less great."

That afternoon, protesters burned a Murkowski campaign office to the ground with several field volunteers in it, in Greenville, South Carolina. No one was hurt, but numerous Trump supporters were arrested.

President Trump tweeted: "Likely fire was started to make us look bad. Lisa from Alaska we can't be tricked MAGA"

In an emotional press conference, RNC Chair Ronna Romney McDaniel announced that she would resign. "I just--I can't do this anymore. The president is...The president is the president. Thank you."

[Sir Mohamed]

Very well written. I'm curious how Trump is driven crazy.

[Progressive]

SOUTH CAROLINA PRIMARY RESULTS

100% Reporting

Donald Trump     54%
Lisa Murkowski    44%

Despite earning the support of South Carolina senator Lindsey Graham, Sen. Lisa Murkowski was not able to win the Palmetto State in the GOP primary. President Trump won by 10 points, but after garnering only 54% of the vote, many Republican operatives theorize that President Trump's base is eroding, even if it makes up a majority of primary voters.

In his victory speech, President Trump appeared particularly unhinged:

"Wow, tonight, what a beautiful night. Tonight's beautiful victory proves that Little Lisa from Alaska will never be able to do what she intends to do which is to tell you that your vote doesn't matter. In fact, I'll say it right here right now. She shouldn't even be in the Senate. No wonder they can't get anything done. Imagine having to work with that face all the time? Come on! Right? They know what I'm talking about. They know.

But tonight is not about Lisa from Alaska. Even though it's hard not to think about it. I mean her husband, does she even have a husband? If she does maybe he's spending a little time with Lindsey Graham if you know what I mean."

Meanwhile, the GOP has a chairperson's race to focus on. Numerous candidates have emerged for GOP Chair:

* Former Trump aide Corey Lewandowski
* New York GOP Chair Ed Cox
* Senior Advisor to President Trump, Stephen Miller
* Former Hewlett Packard CEO Carly Fiorina
* Former American Conservative Union Chair Al Cardenas

Sources close to President Trump admit that the President originally wanted to leave the post vacant, concluding that a weaker national party will allow Trump to roll over Murkowski more easily in the primary. Trump reportedly wants Ed Cox and Stephen Miller to serve as co-chairs. Sources close to Sen. Murkowski suggested that Lisa has given her blessing to Fiorina and Cardenas.

NEXT UP: Super Tuesday states (Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Georgia, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Texas, Vermont, Virginia). Lisa Murkowski badly needs to win several of these states.

[Progressive]

FIORINA, CARDENAS WILL LEAD GOP

Former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina has been elected RNC Chair while Al Cardenas will serve as a Deputy Chair for the Republican Party.

In a Twitter missive, President Trump derided the RNC vote: "Globalists Hillary supporters conspired to take over our party. DONT LET THEM."

[Bidenworth2020]

what happened to this tl?

[tmthforu94]

Hope to see more of this!

[President Punxsutawney Phil]

Hope to see more of this!

[GAKas]

Hope to see more of this!

[TheSaint250]

This better come back. I wanna see ether Lisa wreck Trump or run a successful write-in campaign.

[P. Clodius Pulcher did nothing wrong]

This better come back. I wanna see ether Lisa wreck Trump or run a successful write-in campaign.

Plot twist: Lisa wins the nomination and Trump splits the base as an independent. He could even concede defeat and support her, until some circumstance makes him mad and he runs a write in campaign causing Lisa to lose, just for the poetic justice

[NewYorkExpress]

This better come back. I wanna see ether Lisa wreck Trump or run a successful write-in campaign.

Plot twist: Lisa wins the nomination and Trump splits the base as an independent. He could even concede defeat and support her, until some circumstance makes him mad and he runs a write in campaign causing Lisa to lose, just for the poetic justice

I'm still pretty sure you're not allowed to run write-in campaigns for President in most states.

[Progressive]

SHOCK: TRUMP CAUGHT ON HOT MIC CALLING MURKOWSKI 'UNF@CKABLE'

Aftern an interview the night before Super Tuesday, President Trump was caught on open mic on the Hannity show referring to the sexual appeal of his primary opponent, Alaska Sen. Lisa Murkowski

"We on break? Sean, are we on the air? No. Ok. Boy. This primary sucks. She [Murkowski] sucks. I hate seeing that face. She'd never make it anywhere but politics. Anywhere but politics, right? She's a dog. Unf@ckable..." before Fox News shut off the entire mic.

Virtually no elected Republican was willing to go on the air to defend Trump's comments but Murkowski was forceful in her response, "The president is a pig. He's a disgrace. Period."

SUPER TUESDAY RESULTS

Alabama
Trump               67%
Murkowski         29%

Alaska
Murkowski         59%
Trump               38%

Arkansas
Trump               65%
Murkowski         32%

Georgia
Murkowski       48.9%
Trump             48.6%

Massachusetts
Murkowski        61%
Trump              36%

Minnesota
Murkowski        50%
Trump              48%

Oklahoma
Trump              63%
Murkowski        35%

Tennesse
Trump              54%
Murkowski        42%

Texas
Trump               52%
Murkowski         45%

Vermont
Murkowski          65%
Trump                33%

Virginia
Murkowski          51%
Trump                47%

With big wins in Alaska, Georgia, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Vermont and Virignia, Lisa Murkowski is within striking distance of Trump's delegate lead.

BLUE = Trump
RED = Murkowski

[NewYorkExpress]

I'm a little surprised Trump still won Texas... I imagine Ted Cruz would swallow his pride and endorse Murkowski, and his supporters would back her as well.

[Progressive]

I'm a little surprised Trump still won Texas... I imagine Ted Cruz would swallow his pride and endorse Murkowski, and his supporters would back her as well.

You just wait

[Progressive]

"FORGET IT!" TRUMP TO DROP OUT OF REPUBLICAN PRIMARY AND RUN AS AN INDEPENDENT UNENCUMBERED

In a seemingly endless 90 minute press conference, President Trump announced that he would no longer seek the Republican nomination for another four years as president. After careful consultation with his hollowed out White House staff, the embattled President decided that he would run as an independent, and has already been offered party lines in various states.

"No, no. Forget it. They made me take a pledge but most people don't know that they didn't even pledge. Now Failed Carly is trying to nudge me out, the best thing that happened to the party out, forget it. I'll run as an independent. If I win then I told you so and if not I get to be rich and happy again," said President Trump who experienced a troubling nosebleed while live on camera.

Meanwhile, Sen. Murkowski was expected to be the Republican nominee, despite numerous candidates trying to make a deal with President Trump, to secure his delegates. Pundits speculated that Trump could still win states since his name would be on the ballot and then release those delegates at the convention. But most top-tier Republicans including Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Tim Scott and others backed Murkowski, jockeying for the VP spot.

Speculation was abound that Mike Pence would not run with Donald Trump as an independent and instead may seek the Republican delegates at the 2020 convention, or may even resign early as Vice President.

The Democrats: Bernie Sanders will be the Democratic nominee.

[Bidenworth2020]

oh god lisa gonna get creamed if this is realkstic

[tmthforu94]

I like the sound of President Murkowski. Good work, keep it up!

[P. Clodius Pulcher did nothing wrong]

Wow I'm hooked

[NewYorkExpress]

Congratulations President Murkowski...couldn't you have made it a little more interesting by nominating Warren, Gillibrand or Klobuchar for the Democrats?

[West_Midlander]

I like the sound of President Murkowski. Good work, keep it up!

[Sir Mohamed]

Fine TL, I'd like to see this continuing.