The Aloha Hour (WE WERE RIGHT)

[Galaxie]

THE ALOHA HOUR

Atlasia's No Spin Zone

Atlasia, let's be frank.

We're tired of our "elected officials" clogging our threads and corrupting our youths.

We're tired of big-shot know-it-alls in Nyman telling us what to do.

We're tired of sensationalist media that acts like we aren't smart enough to know what really happens behind the closed doors of Congress.

We the People of Atlasia demand a no-bark, all-bite leader. A champion of the people.

I am your champion.

Join me, Galaxie, in my quest to tell you the truth, and cut through the lies that you have been fed.

Join me in The Aloha Hour. Atlasia's No Spin Zone.

Note, the views of the No-Spin-Zone^TM are not reflective of the views of MP Galaxie, or any member of the Peace Party.

[Galaxie]

Reserved for No-Spin Facts.

[Galaxie]

CONTEST THIS

A No-Spin Look at Our Democracy

Atlasia, we have a problem.

Hold on, the size of this text isn't alarming enough.

Atlasia, we have a problem.

That's better.

Atlasia, we are having elections left and right and not a single one of them is being contested... What are we folks, a one party state?

I am -- as any good Atlasian should be -- appalled by how little Democracy we have in this so-called "Democracy Simulator".

Let's assess the Official No-Spin Facts^TM here, folks, presented by House Speaker Pericles.

Fremont keeps on having unopposed elections, these two Senate races, the Class I Special, the FM election, Galaxie's special,  the June Senate race, Canis's special.

This is ridiculous.

I agree, Mr. Speaker.

Now trust me, I am more than happy that my election wasn't contested -- I mean, who would even want to run against me in the first place? But all these other ones? That is not right. You know, if you ask me, it sounds like someone is behind this.

I've heard someone on Discord saying that I only oppose unopposed elections when it's not a left-wingers going unopposed. And yes, I'll admit I'd prefer a left-winger to win 100% of the vote

I found my April Senate race a bad experience on a personal level

I'll admit I'm partially to blame here, I considered running against Sestak and one of the main reasons I chose the House instead was because I presumed he'd beat me

Very interesting, Mr. Speaker.

Let's do some math here, folks. Since April's election where Pericles lost to wxtransit, Fremont's number of uncontested elections has skyrocketed. Notice how all of Pericles' examples are after April? I did too. Heck, I remember most of these happening!

Let's dig even deeper. Maybe the reason that Pericles has avoided running in Fremont again is because of his April loss. Let me put it this way: Pericles has stopped running, and has instead created a vengeance machine against pseudo-fascist right-winger wxtransit.

These uncontested elections are for left-wingers he wants, right? And what happens if a centrist, or worse, a real, live right winger runs? Let Sestak tell you. Pericles purposefully doesn't run and writes in candidates to humiliate the Atlasian right. Don't believe me? It's on our voting rolls, folks.

Look at our current double-special election! Pericles strategically leaves Canis' election uncontested -- he is a left winger after all, one of the good guys -- and writes-in a cry for help instead of Tea Party Hater. That cry for help may not be winning right now, but when Pericles' army hears the dog whistle and comes rolling in, nobody is safe.

I don't know exactly why we have this systematic problem in Fremont

I think I might, Mr. Speaker. When Boss Pericles doesn't want a race contested, the race stays uncontested. When Boss Pericles sees a member of the Atlasian Regressive Right, they get humiliated. Call it a conspiracy, but I call it case closed. Let's see you put your money where your mouth is, Mr. Speaker. Pericles, I call upon you to run in every single election in Fremont from this day forward. Any patriot can acknowledge a problem, but a true patriot solves it.

If that's a bit too much 100% prime rib t-bone steak^TM to swallow, I'll give you an easy way out. Why don't you encourage candidates of all stripes to run -- no less than 10 per election -- to make our Democracy whole again.

Democracy dies in darkness, folks. And it's pretty freaking dark right now. Our No-Spin-Zone^TM here on The Aloha Hour is shining a big fat light, may God help us.

[Galaxie]

WE WERE RIGHT

WRITE IN WALLACE TAKES THE LEADHenryWallaceVP; 54.55%(12 votes)

Tea Party Hater; 45.45%(10 votes)

The Atlasian Post projects that, for Fremont's Class II Senate seat, it is Too Close to Call

Note that Wallace is a valid write-in candidate, having confirmed his candidacy and written in himself, and furthermore he has told me he intends to win the Senate seat outright.

FOLKS. In a stunning but altogether unsurprising turn of events, Pericles appears to have taken an old card out of his playbook and decided to field Fmr. Senator HenryWallaceVP to run against mecha conservative Tea Party Hater, and the craziest part is... IT WORKED.

Don't let the name "Tea Party Hater" fool you here, Atlasia, this dude is a cold-blooded killer. He is almost certainly rabidly capitalist, and almost certainly up to no good. Because Pericles forgot to humiliate the right in this election, our first blockbuster article gave him the reminder he needed.

Note that Wallace is a valid write-in candidate, having confirmed his candidacy and written in himself, and furthermore he has told me he intends to win the Senate seat outright.

Notice how HenryWallace and Pericles have already corresponded over this election and the former's intentions to win the seat? I'm not saying the conveniently-timed insurgent candidacy from the lately inactive Wallace was an inside job, but I am saying that someone from the inside definitely had something to say about this.

You can go to sleep easily tonight, Fremont. Our satanically conservative interim Senator is out of a job, and Boss Pericles has again scored a win for Atlasia's Political Machines^TM.

You may ask where we get our crystal ball from. We don't have one. We instead have minds liberated from the lamestream media's laser-eyes and hearts big enough for all of Atlasia. The next time you see something on these mean streets that the Old Guard don't want us to know, give us a shout. We listen to you, the people.

This has been The Aloha Hour^TM Special Election Special. Atlasia's No-Spin-Zone^TM