old timey villain
cope1989
Jr. Member
Posts: 1,741
|
 |
« on: May 13, 2014, 01:06:38 PM » |
|
December 2013: Thanks to glorious successes of the generous President Romney, the Democratic Party dissolves itself in great shame, as they can not match the 1.6 billion jobs that have brought honor and a bounty of foodstuffs upon billions of American workers.
January 2014: The strong President Romney fights off massive polar vortex with only his bare hands, bringing pleasant weathers and early spring to entire nation. Americans show gratitude by converting to Mormonism- now state religion of America
February 2014: Americans, now strong and healthy with nutritious foods, win every medal in the Sochi Winter Games. A disgraced Putin surrenders Russia as territory of United States. Cold, starving Russian rejoice greatly!
March 2014: Romney makes perfect bracket for basketball sports game competition and disperses his billion dollar earnings among citizens. One dollar for each worker (aged 3 and up).
April 2014: President Romney, also blessed with great humor and laughing abilities, named replacement for anti-American hack David Letterman, who wisely realized his graying hair and lack of talent is no match for youthful telegenic appearance of handsome President Romney. "Late Night with hilarious Romney" will be only TV program in America beginning 2015. Glorious!
May 2014: President Romney fights pollen allergies. A concerned nation keeps vigil.
|
